"Can I Get Your Advice on Something?"

The reality is, children often go to their parents for advice already knowing the decision they would make even if their parents’ decision doesn’t agree with theirs- so watch out. If your child comes to you asking if they should join a fraternity or sorority, they are interested in pledging or have already received a bid from at least one house. If you let your child know the typical expectations in Greek fraternity and sorority life, which revolve around heavy drinking and excessive partying, it may not sit well with them. They may even join to spite you. Responding with “I never pledged so I’m not entirely sure. Tell me why you’re interested” is optimal because you’re not passing judgment and are gauging their curiosity at the same time. This won’t work if your child knows you were a Kappa Sigma, of course, so tell them what your experience was like – positive or negative – and let them choose their path from there. If you loved going Greek, maybe they will too- but if your time was less than perfect, being honesty without malice or critical judgement could be a key factor in your child’s final choice.

For some unsolicited advice: You are responsible for your child’s existence on this planet but if they don’t directly ask you what your opinion is, don’t offer it. Doing so will make you seem meddlesome or wary of your child’s decision-making skills and it’s likely that it will prevent your child from coming to you for advice at all. When in doubt, trying listening without response unless you truly feel your child’s decision could threaten their safety or jeopardize their future.

Last Edited: July 2015

Latest College & Financial Aid News

Another Governor Pushing for Free College Tuition?

January 17, 2017

by Susan Dutca

Prospective Rhode Island college students may score two years of free college with Governor Gina M. Raimondo's $30 million plan, Rhode Island's Promise. Beginning with the class of 2017, the plan would foot full tuition bills and mandatory fees, according to Inside Higher Ed.

In an effort to "knock down the financial barriers to obtaining a college degree," Gov. Raimondo's proposed [...]

Modern College Culture: Sex, Booze & Entitlement?

January 10, 2017

by Susan Dutca

College is supposed to be the best four years of your life. Or as one sociology professor claims: "a big four-year orgy." Was college always this fun? History may indicate otherwise, and Lisa Wade highlights a "demographic shift" 300 years ago that changed the college campus landscape and made colleges bastions of sex, booze, and entitlement.

U.S. colleges during the colonial era [...]

Guaranteed, Largest Dollar Scholarships by State

January 5, 2017

by Susan Dutca

While you can always increase your chances at landing a scholarship - increasing your community service and extracurricular involvement, having good grades and writing strong essays - winning one isn't always guaranteed...or can it be? According to TIME Money, one way to secure a scholarship is to apply to, and attend a college that guarantees its incoming class free college money. Here [...]

Follow Us:

facebook twitter rss feed